Stewart Francis – One Liners

Here is Stewart Francis with his brilliant one liners

this is him appearing on British television (ITV) on the show for one night only.

Here are a few of his famous one-liners:

I’m a very proud Canadian who is very proud of the educational system in Canadia…

Did I already tell you my Alzheimer’s joke?

My uncle was crushed by a piano; his funeral was very low key.

Did I already do my déjà vu joke?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

I went to my local library yesterday, and asked: “Have you got a book on handling rejection without killing?”

My teacher said I’d do much better at school if I stopped flirting… I immediately got off his lap.

I went to a Karaoke Bar last night that didn’t play any 70s music. At first I was afraid, oh I was petrified.

NOTE: Not all the jokes are from mock the week, there are some but not alot compared to this show,

Awards (The Best Ones) 13th – 14th Oct 08 #72 – Most Discussed (Today) – Comedy #40 – Most Viewed (Today) – Comedy #85 – Most Viewed (Today) – Comedy – Ireland #35 – Top Favorited (Today) #15 – Top Favorited (Today) – Comedy …